I have been considering the idea of bootstraps and how blessed I am to even have some to pull up.
My life has not been easy but I feel very blessed when I open my eyes to see it. I was raised in a moderately affluent suburb that had well funded schools with involved parents. The teachers cared and I was able to learn to read and write, math, social studies and science. Although my home life was volatile I went to school regularly, at least up until high school. My dad went to work every single day. He has a master's degree so I saw that college was a good attainable thing even though I haven't gone myself. I have a strong work ethic. My mom loved(s) me. I experienced poverty as a teen and determined that I would not live that way when I was grown. I have a GED, Master Plumbers license and a natural yearning to learn. I never went to bed hungry for food. I always had adequate clothing and shelter. Always had utilities other than a few times as a teen. I have never succumbed to debilitating addictions, I have sought ought counseling for over 20 years now. I had faith handed down to me that required me to own it myself. I had a pet cat. I have siblings who love me. My parents love me. I went to government funded Job Corps to start a trade. My brother got me my first two plumbing jobs. I had people who would train me. I wanted to learn. I have grit. I have a doctor who doesn't over prescribe. I have always had my career and therefore always had health insurance. I fell in love and married my best friend 21 years ago. We choose counseling as needed. She came from a stable loving family although they are not perfect either. I was taught to build credit from the time I was 21, staring with a gas card. My trade pays well. We bought a house, sold a the house and made money and bought another house. Some health issues over the years in my family but overall, healthy. I have three beautiful loving children that I worry how they will ultimately adjust to everything life will throw at them but now their lives, even with struggles, are well taken care of. I am a white male who is clean cut. I was able to get a loan to be able to become an entrepreneur. I own an essential business. I have been given loans from family in the past at low interest. I am a go-getter. I value self-care. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ.
Many of these things were beyond my control or happenstance. Some definitely were and I am beyond thankful for the healthy choices made. I have never really been alone to face whatever is before me. A few slight adjustments in my life and things are way different. Once as teen I was pulled over for riding my bike with no headlight with friends. We looked like trouble makers. I had pot in my pocket and the police officer missed it due to sunglasses. Imagine if had I gone to juvie in southern California. I hung out with racist, thuggish kids as a teen, What if that had stuck? I tried multiple drugs as a teen. What if that stuck? I was in a gang as a teen. What if that stuck? What if counseling scared me too much to go? What if bitterness and distrust took hold. Who would I be today?
I have no idea why I choose differently. I blame and thank God. It is all God's grace. Why did I want more and somehow, expect I would get it? I actually have no boot straps. I have people who love me and saw better for me even before I did. All the blessings in my life seem fairly normal but take away any one of them and I am not the same. So many have less going for them. So many don't see everything they have. Life is such a mix of choices and things beyond our control. Don't think too highly of yourself for the choices that have worked out for you. Remember those that haven't. We are not equipped with all the information needed to even come up with an even somewhat well informed judgement of others, let alone condemnation. Poor choices do have consequences but that does not mean we get to look down on anyone. Desperation can be fuel for expedient poor choices. Don’t look down on those in need of help. Seriously, don’t.
I will never know why life is so unfair at times. It is for us all. It is also beautiful for us all. Do what you can. You are not a victim in this life even though you have been victimized and experienced injustice.
Remember your blessings and be thankful. Being self-made is about the most delusional thing we can believe. Even if you are keen to the ways of our systems, you had help along the way.