God’s Protection

I have been reflecting on the various debates I engaged in with my Mom and my sister over the years. We are all deeply committed Christians yet came to different conclusions over time. If you have read my blogs, you know I had an (E)vangelical background before finding my home in the Episcopal tradition. I understood the Evangelical language. I am not sure how often my language communicated well my perspective. I am also fairly certain I misunderstood or even mischaracterized their POV. Sigh...

My youngest son told me about a year ago that when he prayed it never worked. Yikes! That is tough. How exactly does prayer work? Is prayer magic? Is it bending the will of God to our own? I often wish it was a magic wand. Is it asking in faith with expectation of the desired response? Is it conforming our will to that of the Father's? Is it a mystery? Is it an active relationship?

When I would discuss things with Mom and Sis there was a heavy emphasis on ‘end of days’ and Jesus’ imminent return as well as getting 'saved'. This return often sounded more like a threat then the world being made right and the full kingdom come. I would always joke about that my ’world’ would end within the next 50 years, hopefully towards the end of that time when I will die. It also came across as a sort of 'hidden' knowledge and *awareness*that they supposedly had. Close to being gnostic but we didn't get into those weeds.

The world has always had evil and sickness and every generation has had delusions of grandeur that they will be the one to see it. We might?!

We are called to watch and be ready for his Glorious Appearing. This will be good whether every eye sees on this earth or if it is when we move on to the next adventure. We do not have any insider information on the end either way, Our end or the world's and this is unsettling. "Wars and rumors of wars" have always been the case as well as earthquakes.

Mom and Sis greatly trusted in God’s protection. Also a form of trust that 'we' would be okay within our family. As if there was a hedge of protection around us. This was more exclusive than they realized. Whether it was a pandemic, basic illness, our country's problems or against government encroachment, this protection would be granted. Mom and Sis would both launch into random prayers for protection. These were acts of love on their part. I miss hearing these prayers.

Let me say that I do not believe in a micro-manager, puppeteer God who ordains and commands every single action in the world. You can make rational argument for that view from the scriptures but I find it extremely lacking if God is truly love. I cannot see God being love just because God defines reality; love will be loving and not confusing.

The idea that God is in absolute control of everything can be comforting until you look at the tragedies in our world from murder to rape to child abuse and abandonment. If God controls these things, God is not good. There is a legitimate critique of God's allowing for these things and I do not have any simple answer except that maybe by Jesus suffering every form of abuse God really is in solidarity with human suffering and experience. God is not only above but within. Jesus wept. Jesus is the exact image of the unseen God and Jesus limits his power. It would make some sense that God exists in a similar way.

A favorite quote from Rober Farar Capon is "God is riding the bicycle of destiny with no hands." Not a clean easy theology but it makes sense with the reality I experience.

I have a real issue with prayer being so 'tit-for-tat' or reciprocal. We are are all called beloved and we have no real idea of the various trials we have been spared of going through. We may never know and I am not saying God is incapable of intervention. Jesus did tell us to ask in his name with faith and what we ask will be granted. I am also not contradicting our Lord. I am questioning. I also believe that the God who raises the dead is not overly concerned with our apparent mortality. It seems sometimes that I have been given the desires of my heart but shielded from little in life although I cannot say I haven't been.

In asking God for anything in faith, is this more about trust or getting what we desire? This is very hard. Think of the martyrs submitting to death. Most likely asking for help but knowing it was unlikely. This is even a modern issue when we remember the 21 Coptic Christians beheaded on a beach just a few years ago. Or what of the earnest prayer of faith for the sick child in our home or other health concern, or the work to be provided to feed our families and for protection from the various evils that lurk in the shadows?

I pray for all these items. I believe as well. What happens when it is not granted according to my will? What if the way situations work out poorly? Are we without faith and is it our fault? Maybe, but that seems to be a way to produce a very unhealthy neurotic faith, that is not Good News.

It is a very hard thing to realize we can and it is good to ask for what we want but that this may not come to pass. It is a paradox. Can we trust the mystery of God? A friend of mine years ago became upset when I gave him The Shack to read by Paul Young. He became upset because the book showed that even with prayer tragedies still happen. He said what is the point of prayer then? This is similar to the challenge my youngest has experienced in his prayers.

Prayer is an engagement in relationship and trust with the Lover of our souls. God knows our needs before we even ask. It is the long, drawn out journey to conform our will to that of the Father. That will is pure love and goodness. A cynic can easily say God doesn't care because of the suffering in the world. How come God didn't protect my sister from being killed? She wholeheartedly believed God was not done with her yet as she was recovering from major surgeries that almost took her life over the past year and a half. Why be on the road to recovery and be snuffed out? This is heart-breaking yet her light still shines. Some things will not be known other than the answer that God gives us the will to choose. And humanity has the dis-ease of evil and apathy within that corrupts the will. The Spirit has still been poured out on us and prays with us completely according to the will of God, God can heal this evil and apathy but love is not an easy path.

Brothers and sisters, don't believe the hype in the American Gospel that all will be prosperous and pain and suffering are not a part of the journey. This is a sure way to hijack your faith when the trials come and they will. Love always carries suffering within as does life itself. In the words of Julian of Norwich “But all will be well, and all will be well, and every kind of thing will be well.” Even in the midst of true pain this is our hope that God is with us and will see all of us through.

It isn't easy to accept this message that life will be a mix of beauty and difficulty.

Jesus said he would be with us always, even to the end of the age. He also said in this life we would experience trials and tribulations but to take heart, he has overcome the world. Embrace the entirety of the journey. It is not easy but it is good. We are never alone.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written,

“For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”

37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:35-39